Essential virtues - for long lasting love -

I just read some article the other days, in this book written by Livingston call 'How to love.'

Here is the key to a long-lasting relationship:

1 Kindness

2 Optimism

3 Courage

4 Loyalty

5 Tolerance

6 Flexibility

7 Beauty

8 Humour

9 Honesty

10 Intelligence

In his book also he wrote that a fulfilling relationships is achieved by picking the right partner in the first place, rather than learning to deal with differences...

That's where a lot of traditional relationships therapy gets it wrong.

There's a lot of talk about negotiating differences and all that sort of stuff that often I feel .. is missing the points, the book says.

I think that it's sort of a ditch-digging school of relationships therapy, that is, that it's hard, nobody's perfect, you have to work on it.

It seems to me that we've been sold on that idea but maybe the problem is that we picked the wrong person in the first place.

People are capable of change but our basic personalities remain relatively stable over time so that the people we are at 20 are very similar in some fundamental aspects to the people we are at 50.

We tend to make our decissoins, sometimes very hasty decissions, based on superficial characteristics that don't wear well.

That course us to make some pretty catastrophic errors early in life.

(Falling in love) is more than a chemical reaction to another person which is the way a lot of people treat it, as if their minds and if their judgment didn't have anything to do with that selection.

The purposed of the book is to point this out and to bring a little more rationality to the process....

Three Cheese Polenta with Lamb Cutlets

8 Lamb cutlets, trimmed

Olive oil for brushing

Sea salt and cracked black pepper

1 quantity three - cheese (recipe below)

1 x 100g brunch rocket leaves - trimmed

Heat a non-stick frying pan over high heat. Brush the cutlets with oil, sprinkle with salt and pepper and cook for 4 - 5mins each side or until cooked to your liking.

Set the cutlets aside and keep warm, divide the three - cheese polenta among serving, top with the cutlets and rocket to serve.

Three - cheese polenta

2 cups hot water

2 1/2 cups milk

1 cup instant polenta

60g butter

50g cup solf blue cheese

1 cup grated cedar cheese

1/4 cup grated parmesan cheese

Place the water and milk in a large saucepan oven high heat and bring to the boil. Slowly pour in the polenta, whisking continuously to prevent any lumps from forming. reduce the heat to low and stir with a wooden spoon for 5 mins or until the polenta start to leave the sides of the pan, stir through the butter, ceddar, blue cheese and parmesan and cook for 1 mins

Enjoy.............!