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Okey, I am no morally bankrupt femme fatale. No, I just-can’t-help-myself nympho. I am not even the gorgeous guy in the room, in any rooms. But up until yesterday, I was happily (perhaps ‘excited’ could be the right word) seeing not one, but three guys. But that I don’t mean I was playing away on one guy with some other guy. That’s just cheating…..
What I mean is that I was seeing one guy, and I was seeing another guy, and I was seeing one another guy. Same deal with each, same level of commitment (did I just says the word COMMITMENT! Gosh…)
But before you start hating me, I swear what I did was just for fun and I am “testing the water” without trying to catch the fish! In the other hand I also wondering why I did this, because I wasn’t looking for a men, neither did I looking for love, especially going out for a date could cost me arms and legs and as well my times. But why? Honestly, because it’s the time for the multi-dating revolution and is about time for me to get to know more peoples, and I don’t have the intention to break some hearts…..
It all started out innocently. Three week ago, the guy I was dating just keep refusing to have a sex with me, even-though he’s still keep coming to me at least three nights a week and slept with me in the same bed, but I just wondering why he keeps rejecting when I wanted to made love with him…… I knew, sex is not that very important in relationships, but it’s part of relationships, especially if both of us attracted to each others. Relationships is not just, dinner for two, watching dvd then good-night kissed. Relationship is more than that, because I’ve been there and done that for a long times. It made me felt that I had been rejected sexually. And what my date needs is my big cuddle and company, that all….. I felt sad about it!
So, I start going out again, my plan were just to have a good night out with my friends either Liz, Rachel or Kenneth, catching up with them, since I haven’t seen them for awhile, we do need to catch what we’ve left in-between, as well to be around of peoples and hopefully to been seen by other peoples.
What I mean is that I was seeing one guy, and I was seeing another guy, and I was seeing one another guy. Same deal with each, same level of commitment (did I just says the word COMMITMENT! Gosh…)
But before you start hating me, I swear what I did was just for fun and I am “testing the water” without trying to catch the fish! In the other hand I also wondering why I did this, because I wasn’t looking for a men, neither did I looking for love, especially going out for a date could cost me arms and legs and as well my times. But why? Honestly, because it’s the time for the multi-dating revolution and is about time for me to get to know more peoples, and I don’t have the intention to break some hearts…..
It all started out innocently. Three week ago, the guy I was dating just keep refusing to have a sex with me, even-though he’s still keep coming to me at least three nights a week and slept with me in the same bed, but I just wondering why he keeps rejecting when I wanted to made love with him…… I knew, sex is not that very important in relationships, but it’s part of relationships, especially if both of us attracted to each others. Relationships is not just, dinner for two, watching dvd then good-night kissed. Relationship is more than that, because I’ve been there and done that for a long times. It made me felt that I had been rejected sexually. And what my date needs is my big cuddle and company, that all….. I felt sad about it!
So, I start going out again, my plan were just to have a good night out with my friends either Liz, Rachel or Kenneth, catching up with them, since I haven’t seen them for awhile, we do need to catch what we’ve left in-between, as well to be around of peoples and hopefully to been seen by other peoples.
At first, I was a little uneasy with those good looking and snobbish mans who’s keeps staring at me, (just because I was in the company of blonde gorgeous woman) but in another hand I felt flattered because at least they looked at me. Same-old-same-old – that what we always said it! Three nights out, and five phone numbers, that shows that I wasn’t doing a bad job at all. Especially in my case as you knew it – old and ugly!
By the end of the week, before my trips to Bangkok, I was making a plan, which one should I call first for a date and which one could be the perfect date. For sure, I have to be balanced (emotionally), I have to be clever, and I have to be fun, because I have to gave them the best of me (without trying to impress) and the most important is me being myself bla… bla…. And more question come up in my head…
Then I asked myself, “What’s my definition of the perfect date?” Flirty chit-chat over dinner with the man of your dreams does sound good. But who’s going to pick-up the tab? If you’re the kind of guy who expected Crystal Champagne and caviar for your pre-dinner drinks that is – take holes - I’ve always a spried to the good life and let face it. To me compliment makes a nice present. But if I was asked to reciprocate, my wallet wouldn’t make the distance.
Anyway, I am sure that being wined and dined like a princess would get tiresome, and part of me has always been attracted to the tortured, impoverished artist – Give a man a paintbrush or a guitar and suddenly every guy want to be his muse.
Either way, there is the expenses of romances to consider. When I meet a new man, there’s a small part of my brain that asked, “Can I really afford a boyfriend?” (as one of my friends put it on dinner table a months ago) The new Dolce & Gabbana, the fancy restaurant, the weekend away bla…. bla….
Anyway, I am sure that being wined and dined like a princess would get tiresome, and part of me has always been attracted to the tortured, impoverished artist – Give a man a paintbrush or a guitar and suddenly every guy want to be his muse.
Either way, there is the expenses of romances to consider. When I meet a new man, there’s a small part of my brain that asked, “Can I really afford a boyfriend?” (as one of my friends put it on dinner table a months ago) The new Dolce & Gabbana, the fancy restaurant, the weekend away bla…. bla….
It’s no joke, dating is an expensive business.
Soon after my Bangkok trips, I made a list and try to figure it out who’s the first to call. And, instead of calling them for dinner at fancy restaurant, I make an arrangement for lunch, it was safer, an hour or two break, during day light and if I don’t get along with him, I could just slip out.
Tony, 28 years old, student from Mongolia, (been living in Melbourne for the past 4 years) beside study here, he also an actor/dancer back home. Met him at The Exchange Bar on Thursday night while am drinking at the bar with Rachel. Wondering around by himself and telling me that, it wasn’t his usual night out to the exchange alone on week night! (Boy! Does this sound familiar to you?) I am going to call him “Mr. Budget”
It’s Sunday afternoon, and it’s going to take a pretty special date to pull me through my hangover. But the sun is shining, so luck is on Tony side, when I suggest we meet at Tea House for lunch.
When we met, Tony’s being dropped off by his flat-mate, while I just 10 minutes walked. He shrugs and says he doesn’t have a car, but always sharing the car with his flat-mate.
He also ten minutes late but assures me, he has been up for hours. “I do sun salutations in the morning.” He says, explaining that they’re part of his daily yoga routine. Still, Tony is undeniably cute. His film-stars smile and gravity – defying hair have a touch of the Rob Lowe about them, and he’s dressed for the occasion, “I bought those on e-bay for $80.00 he boasts, modeling a pair of worm but stylish diesel jeans. You can buy pretty much anything on the site for a bargin….”
He turn out to be great company, it doesn’t take money to have a laugh. “What’s the most you have spent on a date?” I ask, ten minutes later, he’s still buried in his hand, “trying to remember.”
He’s got plenty to talk about when it comes to acting, dancing, martial arts and the latest movies, but Tony hasn’t travelled much, as we stall on the subject of Europe and world politics. When I steer the conversation back to his ‘art’ his enthusiasm returns, “Acting isn’t my choice, it’s something you just have to do.” He says.
His passion is a big turn on. But I wonder if it would sustain a relationship.
By 2pm, it’s time to ask for the bills, and when the bills finally arrived, I could tell, he been counting how much his part is and how much money he’s going to put in. As for me, I don’t really care about who’s going to pay, I am willing to pay the whole lots but at the end he put his part on the tray and I have no problem with it.
Because he’s in a rush and our date has gone longer than we expected, I offer to pay for the taxi. He accepts without hesitation. I can’t really afford it, but we’ve had a good day and convince myself there is something sexy about paying for someone else. Not that I’d want to make a habit on it. He gave me a big hug before he jumped into the taxi with his broad smile.
Soon after my Bangkok trips, I made a list and try to figure it out who’s the first to call. And, instead of calling them for dinner at fancy restaurant, I make an arrangement for lunch, it was safer, an hour or two break, during day light and if I don’t get along with him, I could just slip out.
Tony, 28 years old, student from Mongolia, (been living in Melbourne for the past 4 years) beside study here, he also an actor/dancer back home. Met him at The Exchange Bar on Thursday night while am drinking at the bar with Rachel. Wondering around by himself and telling me that, it wasn’t his usual night out to the exchange alone on week night! (Boy! Does this sound familiar to you?) I am going to call him “Mr. Budget”
It’s Sunday afternoon, and it’s going to take a pretty special date to pull me through my hangover. But the sun is shining, so luck is on Tony side, when I suggest we meet at Tea House for lunch.
When we met, Tony’s being dropped off by his flat-mate, while I just 10 minutes walked. He shrugs and says he doesn’t have a car, but always sharing the car with his flat-mate.
He also ten minutes late but assures me, he has been up for hours. “I do sun salutations in the morning.” He says, explaining that they’re part of his daily yoga routine. Still, Tony is undeniably cute. His film-stars smile and gravity – defying hair have a touch of the Rob Lowe about them, and he’s dressed for the occasion, “I bought those on e-bay for $80.00 he boasts, modeling a pair of worm but stylish diesel jeans. You can buy pretty much anything on the site for a bargin….”
He turn out to be great company, it doesn’t take money to have a laugh. “What’s the most you have spent on a date?” I ask, ten minutes later, he’s still buried in his hand, “trying to remember.”
He’s got plenty to talk about when it comes to acting, dancing, martial arts and the latest movies, but Tony hasn’t travelled much, as we stall on the subject of Europe and world politics. When I steer the conversation back to his ‘art’ his enthusiasm returns, “Acting isn’t my choice, it’s something you just have to do.” He says.
His passion is a big turn on. But I wonder if it would sustain a relationship.
By 2pm, it’s time to ask for the bills, and when the bills finally arrived, I could tell, he been counting how much his part is and how much money he’s going to put in. As for me, I don’t really care about who’s going to pay, I am willing to pay the whole lots but at the end he put his part on the tray and I have no problem with it.
Because he’s in a rush and our date has gone longer than we expected, I offer to pay for the taxi. He accepts without hesitation. I can’t really afford it, but we’ve had a good day and convince myself there is something sexy about paying for someone else. Not that I’d want to make a habit on it. He gave me a big hug before he jumped into the taxi with his broad smile.
Darek, 36 years old, Art Director. Met him at Taxi Bar @ Flinder St, He told me he just drop-by with his mates after the movie, and as usual man always telling me that it wasn’t they usual night out to the bar! I am going to call him “Mr. Sensible.”
The middle of the road approach to spending money doesn’t sound as exciting as prospect as I might have hoped. Still at least I don’t feel out of my depth, and I figure I can safely assume there’ll be no pre-date concerns about who’s going to foot the bill – we going dutch-
The middle of the road approach to spending money doesn’t sound as exciting as prospect as I might have hoped. Still at least I don’t feel out of my depth, and I figure I can safely assume there’ll be no pre-date concerns about who’s going to foot the bill – we going dutch-
Darek’s has suggested we spend an afternoon at the Islamic art gallery @ Melbourne Art Centre, that’s whole petri dish worth of culture, but I am ready for some intellectual stimulation. He swings by my place and we split the entrance fees.
There’s and assumption that our wallets are the same size, which I suspect is slightly off the mark, in fact, I probably don’t earn anywhere near him, but I am flattered to be treated as an equal –even if it does mean spending beyond my means. Mooching around the exhibits, I keep half an eyes on a Canaletto (that’s one of Chinese’s Muslim painting, and not a pasta dish!) and half on Darek, whose insanely gorgeous body (from running everyday at the park) and mix of designer and vintage threads make pleasant viewing. “I bought this top from New York during my business trips there!” he says, adjusting it’s stripes over a grey jacket that he claims “still smells of New York.” The facts that Mr. Sensible has made an effort to impress me make this feel like a proper date.
There’s and assumption that our wallets are the same size, which I suspect is slightly off the mark, in fact, I probably don’t earn anywhere near him, but I am flattered to be treated as an equal –even if it does mean spending beyond my means. Mooching around the exhibits, I keep half an eyes on a Canaletto (that’s one of Chinese’s Muslim painting, and not a pasta dish!) and half on Darek, whose insanely gorgeous body (from running everyday at the park) and mix of designer and vintage threads make pleasant viewing. “I bought this top from New York during my business trips there!” he says, adjusting it’s stripes over a grey jacket that he claims “still smells of New York.” The facts that Mr. Sensible has made an effort to impress me make this feel like a proper date.
We chat about a range of things. He’s well travelled – “I am talking to my friend about meeting up in Shanghai before Christmas,” – and self educated in pretty much all the art, religion and politics.
Darek’s the perfect gentlemen without making me feel like a trophy date. We went to the café next to the gallery for quick snacks and we pay dutch. At the end of the day, my wallet is still in relatively good shape, and I’ve got just enough to treat us for couple of drinks at the Taxi Bar. Before I am heading for my happy hours with Ken and Joseph, “We should do this again, and I really want to sit-down for dinner with you, when you free.” Darek suggests – and I know I won’t have to check my bank balance before agreeing.
Thompson 45 years old, Financial Adviser, met him at Hilton's on Ladies night. I went there with Liz (her husband was away for work trip) he told me that it’s his first time to Hilton and been drag by his Lady friend who’s going to meet Liz’s. Tom (as he likes to be called) is half English and half Middle East. I am going to call him “Mr. Moneybag”
Darek is in the lead when I get call from Tom to confirm our date. Only a moneybags would suggest meeting on Tuesday afternoon – no need to plan for weekends when you’re semi-retired before you reach fifty.
I don’t want to seem shallow or to easily impressed, but when Tom utters the “F – word”, I put down my cup of coffee and Darek’s already a distant memory. “I’ll pick you up at 11.30 am in my red Ferrari.” Tom says. “Then I’ll bring you to someplace to surprises you.” (OK! Is he kidding me?)
Tom look expensive, his sunnies read “GUCCI” and when I peek inside his suit jacket, the word “VERSACE” dazzles me in monogrammed silk. What’s more, there many touches of chivalry on our date. Every-times we stop the car (he stopped the car!) Tom’s races to the passenger side to open the door. “No one can ever find the handle.” He reassures me as I make frantic grabs at the upholstery. A passer-by pulled out a camera and takes out picture. Is Tom famous?” They just like the car.” He laughs.
“Every so often, I take some of the kids from the disable home around the race-track in Albert Park.”
Tom tell me, “I gave one of the boy a limited-edition of Ferrari cap – you can’t get one outside the grand prix – and his mother says he won’t let it leave the house.”
God….. Is that a halo or a solar eclipse? I am blinded by his generosity a money, a good looks and a Buddhist – like concern for social welfare – he is Richard Gere…..
When you date money, things happen, Door magically open before you reach them, remote control lock vehicles for your convenience, and you suddenly have a ‘Fantasy Island’ style at your disposal.
The restaurant is elegant and exclusive. Tom orders from the wine list with conviction, deciding on a Shaw and Smith Sauvignon Blanc.
“It’s a great choice.” I said. “I have no idea.” He laughs. It wasn’t cheap and wasn’t pricey either.” Tom isn’t one to flash the cash. After filing me in with his banking and property coaching business (how to buy well and earn squillions) he tells me he’s been moonlighting as an extra in films as advertisement.
After we finished our meals, he order Bollinger just because he knew that I love champagne, it’s very French…..I love it!
After lunch, Tom says there’s no question of me sharing the tabs. When it’s time to leave, he kissed my neck and revs the Ferrari and extra decibel. Who wants to date a millionaire? (Sorry! not me for sure).
Tom’s was a lovely, intelligent, caring mature gay man, I like the way he carry himself, the way he talked, the way he advise me about my next project bla….. bla…. One thing about him doesn’t turn me on, it’s about the money things and the way he trying very hard to impress me etc…. It really a big turn off for me!
So, Tony was fun but not that intelligent, while Darek is more sensible and natural, all of them has been calling me and texting me, my phone seem like a hot-line for the past weeks. All of them had been asking me for more date…..
Let the game begun….!
Till then, will update you more about my second date with them…..
Till then, will update you more about my second date with them…..
And call me the “heart breaker” but I promised, I won’t touch their heart and I promised I’ll be gently with them……
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