What is P E R F E C T

THEY SAY THAT NOBODY IS P E R F E C T.

THEN THEY TELL YOU PRACTICE MAKES

P - E - R - F - E - C - T......!!!!!!

I WISH THEY'D MAKE UP THEIR MINDS....

Where have all the real men gone?

What happened to the real men.

The other day when visiting the Pavilion Shopping Mall with a couple of my mates, I noticed a strange trend. Well, in our minds anyway.

You see, we couldn't work out whether the men we were watching – many of whom had shaved legs, were sporting short, slightly see-through shorts and sunglasses so large they could have rivalled Nicole Richie's – were gay or straight.

Sure, they were chatting up girls. But, really, what the heck has happened to the blokey Kuala Lumpur bloke?

"We don't want shaved legs," said one of my Lady-friends, pointing out those who stood in front of us.

"We like hair. Maybe not so much on the chest, but definitely in the leg region. We definitely like it in the other region too. Yes, men, we like your nether regions unshaved. Otherwise it's too feminine."

Really?

"Yes, I don't mind a bit of hair in my teeth. And we like shorts that don't show their package and that cover their region."

(Apologies to all the men we encouraged on this forum to get waxed. Seriously.)

"Oh, and the sunglasses?" she ranted on. "We like to actually see your face. And my personal sentiment? Enough of the tattoos."

In short, she says the message to men should be this: "We like men hairy. We like them masculine. And we want the caveman back!"

To discover exactly where we're at in terms of the man trends (who can forget the technosexual or the retrosexual I wrote about in 2007?), I consulted Mark Simpson, who invented the word "

metrosexual" in 1994.

Yep, the forward-thinking British journalist had seen the future of the male species when he visited an exhibition put on by GQ magazine in London in 1994.

"I'd seen the future and it was moisturised," he told me. The exhibition prompted him to coin the term in an article he penned for The Independent newspaper and suddenly the trend spread faster than the hot wax the men were using to wax their nads.

"It seemed to me that in the early '90s, male beauty came out of the closet. Man felt no more shame in his appearance."

While the concept didn't fully take off until the early nineties – "In the '90s people were in a little bit of denial about what was happening to men and why they were spending so long in the bathroom, but in the nineties it was impossible to ignore" – suddenly metrosexuals were everywhere.

Simpson pointed a well-manicured finger at metrosexual pin-up boy

David Beckham, who wore a sarong, painted his nails and posed for a semi-nude photoshoot in a gay magazine.

"At the time, this kind of behaviour by a football hero was unheard of in the UK. But when he started projecting metrosexual behaviour so openly, we quickly went from denial in the '90s to metrosexual mania in the early nineties when the word was overused … and men got a bit obsessed with facials and flip flops."

Nowadays, he says, metrosexual men are pretty much the norm.

"So many things metrosexuals do have just become acceptable and hardly worthy of comment that these days it's not enough to draw attention to yourself."

Hence, these days, in order to get noticed, Simpson says some men are going one step further. He's termed the new bloke on the block the "Alphaesthete", with pin-up boys being the likes of football player

Cristiano Ronaldo and comedian Russell Brand.

"Because metrosexuality is so commonplace, the new bloke manages to stand out despite that. What makes him stand out is generally the fact that he is not terribly concerned with what other people will say."

Apparently this new bloke is not just concerned about looking good and taking care of himself but he is not ashamed of being self-obsessed, pushing boundaries and ensuring that his outlandish behaviour isn't indicative of his sexuality.

"He is not worried about whether something is masculine, gay or straight; he just does what he wants. He doesn't need a product with the word 'man' in front of it – manscara or a manbag. Instead he just wears and does what makes him feel good about himself. He is cutting edge, avant-garde."

So is that what's happening to our Malaysian blokes? Are they so bored of being termed metrosexuals that they've gone one step further?

Of course the dudes we saw at the Pavilion Shopping Mall are a small subset of men who (we hope) aren't exactly indicative of where the entire male species is heading.

While we can applaud these sorts for being so fearless that they don't give a toss what others think (or at least they purport to be that way), when it gets to a point at which women can't work out whether they're gay, straight or somewhere in between … perhaps something needs to be done.

Perhaps, as my friend says, we need an intervention. Perhaps we need a movement. Perhaps we need to encourage blokes to bring their inner caveman back.

Either way, I think I'll start hanging out at a pub instead of a designer pool bar where sport is on TV and the only thing they're serving is beer. No designer cocktails or wet chiselled bodies (sans hair) in sight ...

Thanks goodness November is back! Men are encouraged to grow a moustache in November with the sole aim of raising vital funds and awareness for men’s health, specifically prostate cancer and depression in men.

Perhaps when the Malaysian men start to grow their Mos, we'll start to see the re-emergence of the caveman after all … and nothing could be sexier. Especially a dude who also does good for mankind while looking good doing it

Till then...

The shocking effects of being SINGLE

Reasons why being single not only sucks, but is a terrible idea

SATC’s Carrie Bradshaw declared that being single meant that you were “pretty sexy and you’re taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.” But I totally disagree. If you are in a relationship and thinking of dumping your other half then make sure you read this first before going through with it. If you are single, then we suggest that you close your eyes, because we take a look at the negative effects of being single. So forget the fun and games; being single is totally rubbish.

It gives you time to think about you
We all like to think about ourselves every once in a while, and yes, we can be utterly selfish. But who wants to really have the extra spare time. All you end up doing is thinking about your flaws, whether you have any personality or personal issues, why you’re really single again, why your relationships fail, the debt that you have, and the weight you’ve gained. You realise that Bridget Jones’s worst fear will possibly happen to you; you will end up dying alone and half eaten by Alsatians. It’s enough to make anyone grin and bear it on the relationship front.

It’s not good for your professional life
So you though that being single meant that you could focus on work and climb the professional ladder? Well, if you do choose to spend more time there, it’s likely colleagues will pass you work; because of course “you are already staying late”. You will end up doing irrelevant work for other people that will get you nowhere. Not only that but you now have nobody to vent your frustrations at after working hours and you may just let something slip to colleagues or friends which could have negative effects.

Domestic discord
Not only do you go home to an empty house, but what exactly is the point in cooking a lovely meal when you have nobody to share it with. There is nobody to watch TV with and decision making and responsibility falls solely on you. And then of course there is the fact that sex becomes a one man affair! It’s a pretty solitary existence as you are left to our own devices to fill the void.

You have to endure the dating game. Again
Your friends may tell you that there are plenty more fish in the sea, but what they don’t tell you is that the majority are losers and all the eligible bachelors have been snapped up. The minefield of dating disasters that you will endure coupled with the wrong choices is enough to wear anyone down.

You actually ruin your friends’ lives too
Not only does a breakup impact your life in many ways, but the decisions you make can actually influence your friends. Believe it or not, but when a couple breaks up or divorces, your friends and family are 75 per cent more likely to break up as well. It’s as though you have set the ball rolling. Now watch the domino effect begin!

You experience withdrawal similar to drugs
Studies have found that the buzz and feel good high that we get from relationships and being in love, is as addictive as drugs. Drugs stimulate the part of the brain that is responsible for enthusiasm and reward, and if someone is shown a picture of someone they are in love with, the same parts of the brain are activated. That’s great when you are in the relationship, but when you become single; you then go cold turkey and suffer the withdrawals.

You actually become poorer
Now; if you are in a relationship and also have a shopping addiction, then we advise you to look after that relationship well so as to avoid a breakup. Why? Because gay men (in my case) are actually poorer after they become single. Say goodbye to fancy restaurants and the lavish life because you will be counting your coins and scraping enough together for a roti canai or nasi lemak.

There are physical side effectsScientists have found that when a person experiences the distress and pain of a broken heart, the reaction is similar to a trauma to the brain and body. Other physical effects that we endure include muscle seizures, depression and worst of all scientists think that depression can increase the severity of arthritis, osteoporosis and cancer. There is also a 58 per cent increase in death rate among those who are single.

Till then..

Conversation killers....

What NOT to say on a first date and topics that are off limits

When you are on a first or second date you are expecting to get to know someone and have a fun evening. However, the quickest way to ensure that that ends is by allowing the conversation to drift into deep waters. There are some things that you just don’t need to talk about when you are in the initial stages of dating someone, and can pretty much be considered off limits. If you enter a committed relationship you are likely talk about many heated topics eventually but in the meantime avoid these so that you start off on the right foot.

Past relationships
This goes without saying, as your date most likely doesn’t want to know about your past relationship nor your sexual exploits so don't drag these issues out of the dirt. Not only should you not broadcast it to people, but you are also taking attention away from the person you are on a date with. If you are going to mention an old flame then you may as well bring them on the date with you. It’s just not going to impact your date romantically or positively so avoid bringing negatives to the table.

Religion, politics and money
It’s a standard rule as all three of these conversations are off limits on a first date and in fact they should never be heavily discussed or brought up unless with close family as it is always advised that if you want to encourage a well-mannered conversation they should be avoided. It definitely depends on the company you are in. Why you may ask? You don’t tell people how much money you make, you don’t tell people who you voted for, and religion, well, that’s just too personal. There is no need for it on a date and you don’t want to have a heated discussion.

General grievances
How your psychotic family and relatives are driving you nuts, how your depressing dead end job is making you miserable, the electricity got cut off because you can afford the bill or the nitty gritty and ugly details of your break-up, are examples of ‘general grievances’. They will guarantee your date stays as far away from you as possible after the dinner and forgetting they ever met you. Everyone has family domestics, get irritated with their job at time and has baggage from past relationship, but thinking these are decent conversation topics when trying to get to know someone is delusional. Remember the purpose of the date is to get to know someone, not to scare them away.

Your health
We all have health issues that pop up at some time, but if for any reason you are seeing a therapist, then leave that topic of conversation on the couch. If you are trying to gain sympathy from your date by relaying your health history then you need to think again. It isn’t really an enticing conversation.

The future
Sure there is nothing wrong with talking about what you want out of life and to achieve, but it is advisable to not ask your date when they want to settle-down, what kind of man that he like. It’s a sure-fire way to not only come across as desperate but to make the other person think twice about calling again

Till then...

Dream DATES....

Resistance is futile: the men that gay men want to date.

Every gay man has a dream guy that they would like to date or some action-figure-type of a man that that they want swooping them off their feet. It is also no secret to the human race that there are certain men that have been proven to be irresistible to gay men and it isn’t necessarily because they have chiselled jaws, a six pack and beautiful looks either.

There are certain traits that gay men are drawn to but there are also professions that some men have that gay men also find incredibly sexy. If you are currently single then take advantage of the many possibilities and try dating a plethora of men. We are basically implying that you shouldn’t let the opportunity of expanding your perspective and horizon pass you by.

The bad boy
Even though they leave trail of broken hearts in their wake there is something that we find irresistible about the bad boy. Perhaps it is the cocky bad boy swagger that we are enthralled by or the fact that they portray the alpha male to the core; a straight ahead, no-apologies, hyper-masculine guy with no feelings for others that somehow we find enticing despite all common sense or warning and when it ends, the psychological grip and nuclear breakdown that we go through is on an epic scale.

The chef
Who can’t resist a guy that can whip up a storm in the kitchen and is constantly com in up with fabulous taste sensations for us to try? We certainly want an order. Not only is it incredibly sexy if a guy can cook but at least you know that when you aren’t able to cook, you and him and anyone else that may be around won’t be starving to death, ordering junk or blowing up the place with a can of baked beans in the microwave. Another way to look at it is that a chef is a man who is creative, sensual and great with his hand!

The foreigner
Ah, the foreigner. What is it about this exotic creature that we find so enthralling? Maybe it is the unique way that they see the world, so the social customs and everyday behaviour that is a little eccentric that grabs our attention. Whatever it is they always seem to be incredibly charming. They just seem to have a certain je ne sais quoi about them that is alluring.

The mans man
Think James Bond or some other secret agent to get the picture. This is the guy that would defend you to the bitter end and there is something about his raw masculinity, charm and charisma that completely does it for you. He is the sharp dresser, the slick talker with MacGyver moves and resourcefulness. You may not know what he actually does, but you sure don’t mind helping him take his mind off of work!

The artist
This guy is spontaneous and he’ll challenge you to think out-of-the-box and urge you to embrace the change that is life in the now. The way that he ‘woos’ is certainly creative whether it be a painting or a simple song. Every gay man wants to feel unique and special and there is no better way that they do this than use you as a muse or a source of inspiration. We are intrigued by this guy creative mind and especially in the way that he incorporates us into his art.

The pilot
Tom Cruise. Top Gun. We don’t really need to say anymore...but we will anyway! How can the thrill of the open sky ever wear off and the chance to travel the world to exotic locations with him (or to meet the foreign guy)? Pilots ooze sex appeal just because they can fly such a vast structure. The whole Top Gun thing worked for Tom and it sure does work for any other guy especially THE uniform!

The older guy

He’s old enough to have settled into his skin and has been involved with enough man’s to know that we require much more than a dinner and a few martinis to get in the mood. They have the ability to keep us on our toes and although the chances of long term compatibility a slim, at least you will walk away worldlier and wiser.

Till then...

Why hasn't he called yet?

Unforeseen signs that shows that he WON'T be calling you up for that second date.

Most gay man had good intuition but it usually disappears when we meet men. Some gay man are smart enough to conclude that the date didn’t go very well and that they are unlikely to go on a second one and then there are some who delusionally wait for that phone call.

How is it that when we look at the situation as an outsider, we can immediately conclude that the outcome isn't too promising, but when we are actually on the date, our radar goes wonky and all our common sense is chucked out the window. Here are some signs you should look out for when you're out on a date; it can save you the momentary emotional distress.

Honestly disinterested
When you find that there isn’t much eye contact between the two of you, especially when he has been sneaking cheeky glimpses of the hot waiter, it's obvious that he isn't fully engaged in the conversation.

What’s in a name?
If he keeps calling you different names on and off during the date then it’s definitely a lost cause. Some people make a decision at the beginning of a date, as to whether or not it will go anywhere. If the guy has made his mind up in the beginning that this is the only date there’s going to be, then he sees no reason to remember your name at all.

And this is....?
If you run into people he knows while the two of you are on a date and he doesn’t introduce you (even as “my date”) or acknowledge that you are there then you may as well take the hint that the evening is a onetime thing only. Even if he does remember your name!

Sky high
He gets utterly drunk progressively throughout the evening and starts to behave like a douche bag. If everything had been going swimmingly then he probably would have remained on his best behaviour to impress you. Acting in this way indicates that he isn’t really bothered about what you think of him.

He thinks you're desperate
Some gay man will do or say anything to snag a man. Everything these gay men do and say from that point on can scream out ‘trying too hard’. They will employ their gayness tricks, manipulation, biological clock, guilt and seductive sex traps to snare him. As cunning as these gay men are, their desperation comes forth as something bubbling ready to explode. Many gay men are weary of these men and run the other way when they meet them.

Thank you and goodnight
If at the end of the date there is no mention of plans for another date or “we must do this again sometime” then take note to cut your losses and realise that there isn’t going to be a second date or a phone call.

You’re the one paying
Have you ever had a person ask you out on a date and then ask you to foot the bill? This is one of the signs your date went badly, but it is a terrible one to have happen. If you instigated the date, you could offer to pay, but if you’re invited and there wasn’t anything mentioned about going Dutch, than clearly he doesn’t care much about impressing you.

In a hurry to drop you off
Your date was checking the time all night and seemed to be waiting for the date to end. The date possibly even ended a bit abruptly. As you two are heading home, he’s sort of disinterested and distracted. The good-byes are rushed and you almost lose your arm as he drives away before the door is closed. You can’t quite pinpoint when the odd behaviour began, but there must have been something that occurred to make your date act like this.

However it happened, this is not an ideal date.

Till then..

Bad break up moments

Crazy, embarrassing and unbelievable ways to break up with someone.

Nobody likes doing it, but when the time comes, there will never be a better time to break up with someone, although we beg to differ. There are plenty of things to consider when you have decided to call it quits in a relationship like what you are going to say, when to do it and how to do it in tactful and sensitive manner.

Breaking up with someone or getting dumped is an earth shattering moment so, make sure that you aren’t completely insensitive and take into account our list of situations and locations to not break up. No doubt your ex will still feel bitter about it but at least you won’t be known as that heartless wench that broke up with him online or similar inappropriate situations.

Facebook
It’s too easy to change your status without the other person knowing and uploading pictures of you and the other guy but it will be a tacky and very insensitive move. It is called the World Wide Web for a reason, and you can bet, a big chunk of that world will be speculating the reasons behind your actions.

If you are thinking of changing your Facebook status, make sure that you talk to the other person first or at least inform them about it. It’s just plain rude to break up with someone over a social networking service.

Happy freaking birthday
Never break up with someone within two weeks of his birthday and make that a month during Valentine's Day. There's no faster entry to the Bitch Hall of Fame than by permanently scarring special days for a soon-to-be-ex. It's just not nice and we have all heard about Karma which nobody wants biting them in the ass.

On holiday
The last person you want to be stuck on a deserted island is the guy you just said, “I’m sorry, but it’s just not working out.” Not only would you be wasting money but your time as well.

Do you honestly want to waste time feeling guilty while you’re on a beautiful island getaway? Unless you can afford a chopper or a private jet to get you out of there, it is best to avoid this scenario.

A formal event
Refrain yourself from breaking up with someone at a formal affair like weddings or your office’s cocktail party. You really wouldn’t want to spend the evening putting your ‘game face’ on for others to see. Plus, you don’t want to be the centre of attention instead of the bride do you?

A restaurant
Ordering appetizers and pretending to have a great time while knowing that you're about to pull the trap door any time soon is a definite no-no. A sit down dinner shouldn’t involve, "I'll have the risotto, and honey, I just don't think this is working out anymore.” Delivering bad news in a crowded area could trigger a sudden outburst from the about to be exiled boyfriend.

And trust us; it will end up an embarrassing moment for both you and him. It’s bad enough his appetite will be ruined; you don’t want to do the same to the other patrons.

Their work place
Swinging by someone’s office to perform the breakup is a terrible idea. "Hey, I was in the neighbourhood. Can we talk for a minute?" Why? You’ll be breaking their heart, ruin their performance at work and that could lead to him requesting for an emergency leave just so he can go home and sulk.

Someone else
With the advancement of technology, breaking up over text messages and a phone call is very much faux pas. For a fee, letsbreakup.com will help inform your other half of the relationship's demise by phone, email or snail mail. Certainly not the most sensitive approach, but it gets the job done like any true coward would do.

Till then

Don'f go breaking my heart

We take a look at different types of break ups and how to deal with them.

There are tons of reasons under the sun why couples break up and however it happens, it is never an easy occasion as it can be extremely painful depending on the circumstances. The end of a relationship means the beginning of a period of mourning and healing for both people.

The time it takes for a person to recover from it also varies, depending on the type of break up that a person experiences. Therefore, understanding them is vital for protecting your relationship from them.

We look at a few different ways that couples may break up.

The first love break up
This is one of the toughest break ups to have to deal with and is usually surrounded with extreme pain and disappointment. This isn’t just any old break-up; this is the boy who taught you what it means to fall in love. It is especially hard because it is usually with someone you thought you would eventually settled down with and the person who showed you what falling in love feels like.

This break up teaches us that the world is a bigger place than we thought. There are more people to meet, bills to pay, and there are places to go. Things just can't stay the same as they once were.

Out of nowhere break up
This type of break up is known as the blindside and is usually harder for only one person in the relationship as it comes out sudden for the other half. Usually, when a break up is on the horizon, we have some indication that things aren't working out well. Someone will start pulling away or acting a little differently. You have no idea that the break up is coming until that person sits you down and tells you that they're leaving or that it is over.

Sadly, this type of break up can wear away a person’s ability to trust. This is because they feel if someone can initiate a breakup with them when things appear to be going so well, then that person that is dumped will usually have a tough time avoiding paranoia and trusting new partners.

The mutual break up
This is as peaceful a break up as you can have, where both partners agree mutually to terminate the relationship. It’s usually when all feelings have died down or when one partner undergoes a major life change, such as a new job far away and can’t seem to stay in a long distance relationship. This sounds like the least painful break up but most people still feel a sense of loss.

If the break up was mutual, both people will experience a period of adjustment where they are getting used to no longer being together. Even if the couple is no longer in love with one another, they will still find that they miss each other greatly.

The circumstantial break up
This is similar to the mutual break up and it usually happens between couples when certain circumstances won’t allow for the relationship to continue.

The recovery for this type of break up is usually easier and shorter as the person who ended it usually offers a decent and reasonable excuse which takes the focus off the possibility that the other person may have unattractive qualities or weaknesses. Or, the person who ended it can blame the break up on something else, for example living too far apart.

He left you
This is usually a very painful break up to experience, especially if you have strong feelings for him. This will also leave you in shock as you'll have no time to prepare.

He usually has his valid reasons for ending the relationship and depending on what they are, it will depend on the pain that the other person experiences. If he has left you for another guy, the feelings of betrayal and hurt will be deep and a person is often left wondering what is wrong with you. However, if it is because he can’t see it lasting, for various reason, it can be easier to deal with and eventually you'll be able to move on.

You left him
When this break up occurs, you have usually had time to think about it for a while and work out what isn’t right about the relationship. You may be unsure about the two of you in terms of compatibility; that you have different aims or goals in life. You also constantly argue or feel that he isn’t really the person that you thought he was or want to spend your time with. It could also be that you have met someone else.

Whatever the reason, you are usually left feeling terrible for hurting the other person. The most important thing is that you know what you want. If you weren’t completely sure, leave it a while and gather your thoughts. Do you want him back just because you miss having a boyfriend or do you actually miss him? Just remember that many people regret break ups right after and usually it’s just a phase.

The ultimatum
Ultimatums can arise for many reasons, for example, asking someone to stop a bad habit. But the most common usually comes down to wanting your other half to make a change, or you're done. Many of us have this vision of how our relationship should look and with that vision, we create defined expectations of our partners sharing that same picture perfect image. So when we make that discovery that important aspects of our current lives are not parallel to our vision, we may decide to deliver an ultimatum to get what we want.

Ultimatums are ultimately created out of insecurity, fear, anger and frustration. All negative emotions and an ultimatum will only have the receiver reacting with defense.
Ultimatum break ups can be tough to get over because it's annoying that a little compromise could have prevented it. But once it's over, that pressure from the stalemate you reached in the relationship is gone, so it can be quite a relief.

Someone’s cheating
Whether you find out from them or some other way, it's the ultimate betrayal when they are cheating on you. You can get over it because you dismiss this person as a cheating jerk, but you still feel stupid and you might spend several months envisioning the cheating.

The abusive relationship break up
Being with an abusive partner is a definite sign that it is time to end things and go your separate ways. While this is a necessary break up, it can often be harder or more painful to walk away from than a normal relationship. This can be hard for friends or family to understand why you miss the person or why you found it so hard to walk away from.

What they don’t understand is that the people who is being abusive wants control, and will usually wear the other person down so that they feel that they won’t be able to cope on their own. The person who has been abused will also be made to feel that they are useless, insignificant, and worthless, and that nobody else will want them so they might as well stay on with their abuser. They become very insecure and unsure of themselves and their decisions.

Discussing your feelings with a therapist or getting anger management might be a good step. Also, stay out of relationships until you recover.

Till then..

The morning after the night before

How to survive a one night stand and waking up in a bedroom that isn't your own.

So you have had a few drinks, been chatting to a guy that you like and towards the end of the evening, have played a fair amount of tonsil tennis with the guy that you fancy all night. You then decide to throw caution to the wind and go home with him.

Both of you end up engage in casual one-night stand because both of you are physically attracted to each other. You’re more likely to carry out the sexual encounter knowing you have no interest in continuing the relationship with him, while the other guy tend to choose sex partners who may provide a future relationship. Whether intentional or not, a one-night stand can be invigorating or shameful and regretful. Whatever the situation, the potentially awkward morning after can be a tedious demon to deal with.

Waking up somewhere other than your own bed can be quite awkward. The walk home can be just as upsetting. But how do you go about conducting a one night romance, wrapping things up and making it home without a morsel of dignity and style?

Here, I give you some tips on how to live to tell the tale - without dying of shame and making it home just in case you ever find yourself in the situation - with some words of wisdom from people who have been there and done that.

The three scenarios

The completely anonymous guy: someone you have never met before and likely you will never see again.

The long time coming: the attractive guy who is among your circle of friends. It was something you knew would happen but put off due to potential negative consequences. Best kept secret when it does happen.

The regrettable: most one-night stands are, but this one is the worst! You wake up next to someone you don’t know or someone that is particularly unattractive without the cover of darkness. Destroy all evidence and reminders of the night.

Damage control
If you wake up in a stranger’s room, you should immediately locate all your personal belongings. The last thing you want to do is return to reclaim a lost sweater. If you can't find something that is unimportant after five minutes, such as a sock, let it go.

The name game
Not only is it bad enough waking up in this situation, but not remembering his name just adds to it. Some advice on working out that riddle from those with experience:

“Your best bet is to find their post or some form of bill which will had their name printed on.”

“I’ve never been exactly in this situation, but why not find their wallet and have a look through if you’re feeling brave enough so you can recap. If this fails, then just call them honey, or whatever.”

You decide or realized that you don’t like him one bit.

“I can imagine the best thing to do in this situation is to just leave and go home. There isn’t any point in hanging around or exchanging contact details to be honest,” says my friend Peter.

In this situation, it is best to pretend that you have to be somewhere and step out of there pretty fast. There are a million and one things that you can come up with to stop him from pursuing you. Mentioning that you have to meet your three brothers may just do the trick.

Mirror mirror on the wall
Quietly sneak into the bathroom to avoid waking up the person next to you. If your new friend is already awake, excuse yourself and go and sort yourself out. This is the first step to prepare you for your exit.

“Make sure that before you leave their apartment or house, you look vaguely normal

The sweet escape
You’ve already decided that fooling around with the man you woke up next to you was a one-time deal, so there’s no reason to stick around for pleasantries. Slip out while he’s still snoring or sneak out when he’s in the shower. “Odds are, he’ll be just as relieved as you are. Plus, nothing is more awkward than over-staying your welcome,” adds Peter

The walk of shame
The majority of people here are fortunate to have some mode of transport, and therefore the ‘walk of shame’, which the journey home is so aptly called, doesn’t necessarily apply here.

However, there are some who use the buses or the monorail, or may live just a hop skip and a hump, sorry, jump away from where they wake up, will need to take note of the following:
“If you are unlucky not to have your own car and are unable to get a lift, then make sure that you avoid public transportation. Always, always have money for a taxi. People won’t notice the walk of shame this way. Only the driver I guess,”

You’re more likely to be shuffling home looking out of place in your smoky shirt. If this applies to you, it is important to avoid eye contact with all those you encounter. Trying to brush off the fact that you are wearing your last night shirt with smiley like an ashtray at 9am the next morning by smiling at all those you pass by on the streets, is a terrible idea. You are currently the epitome of embarrassment and there is nothing worse than your neighbors seeing you come home at the early hours wearing the previous night shirt. There is just no explaining that one, it's as obvious as it gets!

We're not encouraging you to go out and have promiscuous sex. But hey, stuff happens, so if you do "do it", don't feel bad about it. Just make sure you're entering the situation in the right frame of mind. Overall, and on a more serious note, it is important to remember (and it should go without saying), those ready to embark on such an encounter need to remember to keep themselves protected. Even though many of us were raised in an era where this message is more prevalent than ever before, it is in everyone's best interest if you constantly remind yourself of the dangers associated with unprotected sex and how the consequences are very real.

Till then,